Thursday, May 24, 2012

Memorial Day: Take II

For the first 20 or so years of my life Memorial Day meant my birthday, cookouts, start of summer, day off work, pools open, etc.  These are memorial days from the past.  Summer fun cookouts.. completely carefree. 

For most Americans, that's what it still is.  Up until a year a half ago I didn't realize how much more there was involved in the day.  This year my birthday is Monday.  I was born on memorial day 22 years ago.  Maybe that's a freaky sign?  I don't know.  Anymore it almost makes me feel guilty that I had that association my whole life.  I didn't even take 5 minutes to think about what the day really meant.  Which is this:

Don't get me wrong.. Memorial day is a time to celebrate.  This year (just like last year) I will take some time to think about what the day is really for.  A day to remember someone as amazing as Josh along with all of the other men and women who have fought for our freedom.  If it wasn't for these people, we wouldn't be with our families, friends, significant others.  We wouldn't have the luxury of this holiday weekend a day off from work.  The least we could do is take a little time out of our day to remember. 

In other news.. I'm extremely busy as usual.   A little happier each day.  I'm excited for my upcoming birthday and what the age of 22 has to hold for me.  Things with Jeff are going well.  He is still dealing with my wid nonsense on a daily basis so I can't complain.  I'm getting better and I am thankful for that (I could never thank my family/friends and Jeff for that.. I really was/am a handful when it comes to this). 

Looking back on old posts can be so painful sometimes.  I somehow managed to block that pain/hurt/anger out of my mind.   I never realized how much I lived on auto pilot until recently.  For a good year I just went through the motions of life.  It's a crazy thing.   Something I never want to relive ever again.  It really was a very dark time in my life.  It's comforting to know that after such a tragedy.. after part of me died.. that there is almost a rebirth.  The freedom of being able to live life again.  To see a light in life that got lost in the dark.  Josh would never want me to live like that.  It's something you would never wish on anyone. 

Anyways, that's what I'll be doing this memorial day.. celebrating my birthday with the people I love and remembering another love, Josh, along with all the other fallen men and women who deserve a thank you. 

So my fellow blog readers.. my challenge/request for you this memorial day is to take 5 minutes away from your holiday celebrations to remember the fallen.  The amazing/brave men and women who allow us to have days like this.  Have a safe and fun holiday weekend!