Thursday, February 24, 2011

Who am I?

I was on facebook a little bit ago responding to some messages.  You know how albums pop up on the side?  Well, one was there that I haven't seen in a while.  I clicked on one and I flipped through all 123 pictures from last spring and summer.  Weddings, birthdays, babies, random stuff.  Leading right up until 2 weeks before that awful day.

I was smiling.  Hugging people.  I was with you.  Laughing.  Having fun.  In love.

I regret it now that I didn't realize how lucky I was.  How in love I was.  How HAPPY I was.  I had everything I ever could have wanted right there in front of me: an amazing boyfriend, a loving family, the best of friends.  I had it all.  And I took it for granted.


I lost one piece of that puzzle and it changed my whole life.  One piece (and probably the biggest) threw my life into a whirlwind.  Changed it forever.  Long last impression doesn't even begin to cover it. 


Take a look.. these are some pictures from that album:











I look at that girl and I feel like I don't even know her anymore.  What happened to her?  I have changed so much in the last six months that I feel like I don't remember who I was because I am nothing like her.  I'm a different person.  Actually, I am still just trying to find myself.  Put the pieces back together to make a new me.

Lacking an identity.

Weird.  So, as I continue on everyday, it's finding more pieces.  Putting them together.  Making a new me and finding happy again.  My most favorite saying ever.. It just takes time. Blah.

2 comments:

  1. You are a strong woman, full of grace and beauty. Josh knew this and the ones that love you the most know this.

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  2. You are Chrissy. A strong, compassionate, and loved woman. You are and will always be Josh's love and happiness. He will always walk by your side and continue to watch over you through others. I pray for you all the time and I know one day you will rise from the ashes of your life and be a new woman. One that knows the sorrows and joy love can bring. Keep the faith even though I know it's hard to right now.

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